Category: Ministry at Home

25 Things I Learned In My 20s

Published on by Abigail Rehmert2 Comments

I’m deeply grateful for the layers of discipleship I’ve received from my parents, my siblings, my grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles, my Sunday School teachers, my college professors, my husband, my husband’s family, my church family, my friends, and my co-workers. What a gift it is to know an “abundance of counselors” (Prov. 11:14).

We’re teaching all the time in how we live our lives, and I’ve learned so much from people who probably didn’t even know they were teaching. Here are 25 things I’ve learned and maybe can encourage another young person.

1. God’s Word brings balance. I’m not that old, but I’ve seen “movements” pendulum swing, as individuals major on the minors or deconstruct their faith entirely. Safeguards and correct alignment come from diligently studying the Bible over time. The more time you spend in the Word (and understanding how to rightly handle it in context), the more balanced spiritual maturity you’ll have. Lord, keep us humble and aligned with truth! 

“For I did not shrink from declaring to you the whole counsel of God.”

Acts 20:27

2. This statement is true: “What if the passage you study today is preparing you for a trial ten years from now? Study faithfully now, trusting that nothing is wasted, whether your study time resolves neatly in thirty minutes or not” (Jen Wilkin). Learn how to study the Bible.

3. College isn’t necessarily for everyone, but gathering up as many skills as you can with your spare time will equip “your tool belt” with gifts to offer others. And truly it is, “More blessed to give than to receive.”

4. Two impactful books I read in my 20s — Just Do Something (Kevin DeYoung) to demystify decision making.  Also The Transforming Power of the Gospel (Jerry Bridges) to help you understand how we can conquer sin.

5. Save all the money you can, even if you don’t know what it’s for yet. A house? A car? A wedding? A trip of a lifetime? Even if you don’t know, just SAVE!  

6. Don’t ever assume because someone is in the same context as you that you agree on all the heart issues. Always be gentle, don’t haphazardly vent about random topics, not knowing the struggles and temptations your “like minded” friend may have.

7. Don’t say “I could never” say “What can I do?”

8. Ask for advice. Wise people don’t usually give advice without being asked.

9. “You don’t have to feel like it in order to do it” (Alison Lumbatis). Do the next thing, and motivation, and perhaps even momentum will follow.

10. Cooking is not a mathy, strict rule-following thing; it can be art! But learn as much cooking science as you can to build a foundation for your creativity.

11. Health knowledge can seem like a fascinating, overwhelming bottomless pit, but at the end of the day, the best things for you are free. Going outside, moving, drinking water, even praying. Trusting God and living in confession of sin will impact your health. 

12. Love people deeply but hold them loosely.

13. You don’t have to finish reading a book you’re not enjoying or benefiting from — it’s not a moral issue.

14. Long-distance dating is very hard, but certainly worth it.

15. Childbirth is truly amazing. So is motherhood and marriage. 

16. “Acknowledge God in all your ways and He will direct your path” (Proverbs 5:6). ABSOLUTELY TRUE, and I often thank God for directing my path, even away from what I thought was best at the time.

17. The gospel never gets old. It’s like a diamond ring, you can examine and admire it from all angles and in all different lights. 

18. Your family culture and heritage is something to be appreciated, observed, and learned from. Respect and learn from the different sub-cultures of other families, too.

19. Have an “easy come, easy go” mindset when it comes to possessions. That way you’re not upset when something breaks.

20. Read The Hiding Place every few years.

21. Use teacups as much as possible.

22. “What’s ordinary to you is magic to someone else” (Brian Dixon). Never underestimate how you can learn from a variety of people and how things you may think are obvious are profoundly impacting others.

23. As opportunity arise, travel as much as you can, and let it sharpen what you can bring to home. When you can’t travel, read about faraway nations in missionary letters and books.

24. “We often (conveniently) judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions.” Instead, be gracious. 

25. Boldly speak truth to your own heart. Be one who, in Christ’s strength, “walks blamelessly and does what is right and speaks truth in his heart” (Psalm 15:2).

Winter Words

Published on by Abigail Rehmert6 Comments

In March 2022 we experienced a magic I don’t know if we’ll ever experience again — we bought our first house, first garage, and first backyard. Pink tulips and daffodils sprung up first with friendship. Each outing and walk felt like we were unfolding out of winter into a new adventurous world of home. The ownership we felt of the streets and the downtown and the community is all tangled up with Easter flowers and rainy sunshine. We enjoyed patio parties and a garden that graciously exploded with beginner’s luck.

While I’m dreaming of sunshine, flower seeds, and iced coffee on a quilt in the lush grass — currently, there are splotches of muddy snow and cold winds.

Toward the end of each of the four seasons, I always feel the draw toward the next. Today I’d like to isolate winter and appreciate it, separate from Christmas, even separate from the stirring of spring. Perhaps only to nudge gratitude from my heart. There’s nothing wrong with anticipating the joys of the earth melting into new life, but putting winter into words causes me to give thanks for —-

The way the sun feels like a hug piercing through the car window on the interstate.

Soup and warm bread are always welcome, or a loaded baked potato, or hot blueberry muffins.

Glittery snow dust spraying down off the neighbor’s roof.

Snuggling up to read picture books like, “Owl Moon,””Katy and the Big Snow,” “The Loud Winter’s Nap,” and “The Coziest Place.”

De-icing the plane so we could escape to the sub-tropics of rainy Houston.

A weekend of solid preaching, encouraging believers, worship, and Texas brisket.

Blazing through books, and feeling like there’s not a better place to be than absorbed in a story or reflecting on a truth.

Enjoying seeing the English countryside in All Creatures Great and Small, admiring how Helen is a faithful and creative helpmeet.

This Little Women soundtrack, heavy with triumph, emotion, and girlhood delight.

The last jar of canned salsa, straining to make it to the ground’s thawing when we’ll garden again.

Discussing the account of Ruth’s redemption by the fireside.

The warmth of togetherness and the flame of hunger for God’s Word.

The Refiner’s Fire.

A chunky-knit throw blanket.

Shopping my own house for new home looks, but also leaving and loving white space.

Hopes of a ski day if the snow sticks.

My son scattering a zoo’s worth of animals throughout the house, and often we sit on cows, horses and giraffes hiding in the couch.

Attempting to follow the mantra, “there’s no such thing as bad weather, just improper clothing” but staying inside a great majority of the time anyway.

An overcast sky ending in array of brilliant colors.

Taking advantage of the things that can only be done inside…like scrubbing the shower or baking.

The way new goals and habits are tested in the trenches of the January doldrums.

Utilizing my mom’s craft table, creating sparkly hearted Valentines, stirrings of bold pink, chocolate strawberries, and family love in our near future.

Waiting for answers, and knowing Either Way, We’ll be Alright.

Treasuring the most lovely gifts, our faith and our family, neither of which I deserve.

The way winter freezes time, slowly thaws it out, offering day after day to rejoice in.

What would you add about your winter?

To-Do: With Love

Published on by Abigail Rehmert5 Comments

Do you ever conquer your to-do list, but forget to do the things — like scramble eggs for breakfast or host a small group — with love? For love? In love?

After studying I Corinthians 13 this summer, I’ve been face-to-face with convicting encouragement. It doesn’t matter how impressive the day’s work, if it’s not accomplished with love, God considers it profitless.

If I mop all my floors and bake sourdough – but do it with an irritable heart toward another, it profits me zero. If I give my best efforts only when I feel like it, or when it blesses me, then what will this accomplish? If I share my possessions with the needy, but am impatient about it, this counts for nothing. 

If we can exegete Scripture and discuss heady doctrines around the dinner table, but secretly rejoice when someone is humiliated for their sin, the mysteries I understand have not pierced my heart. 

If I check all the “good Christian” boxes, but boast and insist on my own way, trampling others’ feelings and preferences, then how will unbelievers or believers see Christ?

If I become a clanging cymbal in the 20 minutes before guests arrive . . . then I’ve sent a message that it’s not really about the people in my home, it’s about my put-togetherness. 

Others do not feel loved by noisy gongs. I often forget, as Myquillyn Smith said, “Hosting is never about the host, and hospitality is never about the home.” I have been deeply ministered to by imperfect hosts with Christlike, gracious hearts. 

One of my favorite homes belongs to my sister who demonstrates a special gift in hospitality. If you’ve been in her little house, you know. She creates the perfect personalized coffee, iced or hot, but also asks the deep questions to glimpse how my soul is doing. I enjoy both edifying conversation and a landscape of curated art and timeless style. I know both she and her home are a work in progress. I know she sacrificed to prepare for my company, and the dancing candle is only one sign. But, if I drop by without giving her much notice, I still receive a big welcome, a listening ear, and a love that shares all she has been given. 

Yes,  love pursues excellence with all the energy God’s gifted, but the ministry of presence is effective even if there’s food in my drain, junk mail on the counter, or wilting plants on the shelf. Love is the ingredient needed for lasting meaning in our ministry of hospitality and service, and it starts with a willing, abiding heart. 

So do I have to do something perfectly for it to “count?” No, nothing we can do will ever earn Christ’s love. If I’m not in Christ, I gain nothing, I am nothing. God is love, and if we are not in Him, we are a dead branch, unable to produce. But if we are walking in the Spirit, these fruits of love and patience will blossom in our attitudes and actions. Our entire motivation changes.

For the love of Christ controls us, having concluded this, that one died for all. 

2 Corinthians 5:14

When you’re tucked into gospel-love, success and even completion look different. His imperative and invitation is that we abide in love, so it’s not a doing, it’s a being. It’s not really about a to-do list, but being compelled by our love for God to walk in the homely or beautiful works He prepared for us. 

He always desires a heart posture, not a show. When we have guests for dinner, I sometimes go to the lengths of making a garlicky, basil dressing from scratch. After the prayer for our meal, my sweet husband will get up from the table and begin to offer our company the ketchup, BBQ sauce, and bottled dressings. 

To be honest, I’ve wanted to chide him later: “But honey, I had everything on the table that we needed! And the salad was already dressed.” But even more than striving for the aesthetic image, I appreciate the way my husband displays his deep care for people and desire to serve them. And do you know what? A troupe of condiments always makes guests feel more at home. Chick-fil-a sauce never fails to produce a laugh, a symbol of down-to-earth commonality. And, I must admit, the potato wedges taste a lot better with it. 

Whether you’re called to love others with dressing homemade or bottled, let Love compel you to walk for His glory alone. As we strike items from our to-do list, or share our imperfect homes, let’s aim for eternal profit. The Spirit’s kindness, patience, and joy will shine through as we abide in Him. 

Waiting for Tulips (the March gifts)

Published on by Abigail RehmertLeave a comment

driving home for the first time

daffodils saying hello

Indian butter chicken

friends who love us enough to clean the showers and every other inch of our moving mess

. . . and haul all our earthly belongings

quilt spread in the backyard grass

first sunburn at a luncheon

waiting for tulips…wondering their color

my sister’s carrot cake with citrus notes

“is anything too small for a child to talk to his father about?” —Anneliese

small prayers answered, as well as big ones

first package on the doorstep, containing a treasure (The Sugar Mouse Cake by Gene Zion)

dressing our new sturdy bookshelf with picture books

cold-brew and premarital counseling

the first grilled chicken of the year

finding an empty cupboard in the kitchen, days into unpacking

meeting the neighbors while bearing spring monster cookies

singing “Safe Am I” to my little one

brave sunshine and a little stroller

shire songs

These Happy Golden Years

baby’s first steps

marco polo conversations with friends from childhood

thrifting finds

1,000 piece puzzle owning our kitchen table

“Home is everything you can walk to.” –Jerry Spinelli

exploring our new home by walking

more thoughts, On Walking from Bethany’s blog

petitioning the God of the impossible, our Defender

–Who never tires of our requests

“How great is Your goodness which You have stored up for those who fear You.” Psalm 31:19

The Good about the Bad

Published on by Abigail RehmertLeave a comment

The sky hung weighty and pale. Backyard held a foggy hush, but inside the whole household glittered with candlelight and beamed with courage.

Christmas togetherness circled a long table laid with evergreen. The year had been mostly good, aside from an unwelcome medical diagnosis in the midst, and this could have disheartened the season.

But . . . joy and light and great news for all people.

In Psalm 112, the ones who fear the Lord are described as blessed and fearless. Light arises in the darkness for the upright, those who delight in His commandments (vv. 1,4).


“For he will never be shaken;
The righteous will be remembered forever.

He will not fear evil tidings;
His heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
His heart is upheld, he will not fear . . . “

Psalm 112:6-8

The reason we’re not cowering in fear of more evil news, tonight or next year, is because:

“…The gospel makes genuinely good news out of every other aspect of my life, including my severest trials.” ― Milton Vincent, A Gospel Primer

Are you clothed in Christ’s righteousness? Be steadfast in heart, trusting the Lord; there’s nothing left to fear.

Think about the shepherds, faced with a reason for terror.

When the sky split, it wasn’t Christmas-pageant, Dance of the Sugarplum Fairy imagery. An angel army began shouting in the sky.

I, too, would have been stricken with fright. I think the shepherds anticipated evil reports, judgment, or end-of-the-world pronouncements. Perhaps their sheep scattered.

No wonder the angel declared “do not be afraid” first of all. Their presence necessitated it.

And an angel of the Lord suddenly stood before them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them; and they were terribly frightened. But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people. For today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” And suddenly there appeared with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

“Glory to God in the highest,
And on earth peace among men with whom He is pleased.”

The shepherds’ fear of bad tidings was overwhelmed by good news in a manger.

The shepherds had sinful souls destined for wrath, and so do we. It paints the bleak night stage, set for the desperately needed good news/great joy of Christ’s birth, His death, and His resurrection.

Still today we have no need to be afraid because the light arises in the darkness. Sinners are called to hear and know the gospel, which changes everything about everything. We are considered “the righteous” because Jesus bought us. Each medical diagnosis is about glory to God in the highest. And He leaves peace with us, but not the kind the world gives.

Nothing can truly shake the righteous one’s position before God. No terror of the night can steal the peace promised that surpasses all understanding.

It’s why my family doesn’t need to fear evil tidings but can rejoice in the knowledge of our eternal security, the goodness of God’s perfect plan, and the desire for gory to the Prince of Peace, come what may. This is the good about the bad.